There are some works that have succubi or incubi-like characters appear that are, as a whole, somewhat confused. By that I mean there’s a lot left open to interpretation by the reader about them. It’s a bit more confusing when the overall plot of the story seems to revolve around the female lead being taken in as many ways as possible, leaving any real story as a bare framework around the erotica.
It can work, sometimes, but when the erotica isn’t even quite a hot flash, needs something more, and just seems not to have the needed heat to drive things forward, the work can’t stand up. All things considered, the characters themselves don’t seem to be able to when the story is done.
- Title: Possessed by a Demon of Desire
- Author: Claudia Skyes
- Length: 29 Pages
- ASIN: B010MZT436
- Publishing Date: June 29, 2015
- This work at Amazon.com
The work tells the story of:
Alexis was a late bloomer – guys made fun of her in high school, she wasn’t much of a looker, and she never even had a boyfriend. But now that she’s in college, she’s gotten herself a ruggedly handsome guy, Jacob, with a toned and well-maintained bod from intercollegiate water polo – but not everything is smooth sailing, because they’ve yet to go beyond first base!
Alexis can’t help but worry if he really finds her attractive, until one night, a visit from a peculiar man, claiming to be a demon, changes everything…
Her boyfriend transforms into a ferocious beast, teeming with lust, and he’s intent on making her his! What can Alexis do, when Jacob doesn’t care where they are, and is bent on satiating his carnal desires?
Alexis is in love with her boyfriend, but no matter what she does, he isn’t going where she wants him to do. A deal struck with a devil means her boyfriend isn’t the same and what happens in the library is something she’s not going to forget.
The thing about the summary of this work is that it suggests a transformation scene of some kind for Jacob, but there’s no such thing. Alexis makes a deal, in a “dream” with Marbas, who seems to be an odd kind of incubus, if that. Then the next day she goes to the library to meet Jacob and he’s only interesting in having sex with her.
Marbas isn’t much of a presence in the story, really only appearing for a few short paragraphs and then vanishing into thin air. The entire meeting is a game, a confused agreement, and really amounts to very little overall. It almost feels like Marbas was added into the work in order to give a reason for what happens between Jacob and Alexis.
What happened to Jacob in-between isn’t told, there’s a hint of what Marbas did at the end of the work, but that’s really thin and barely tells what happened. It’s more disappointing because the summary suggests there’s a major change in Jacob, but the only thing that happens is that “he” wants to push Alexis over a study table and have his way with her.
That theme runs into the erotica, which isn’t so much erotica as it is a porn movie scene with a little bit of story to tie things together. There’s little heat as a whole, the characters are just going through the motions and when the scene is over, there’s no story to pick things up.
The work comes to an abrupt end, a sort of silly and expected one, and it wasn’t all that interesting. This is a hot flash, but the heat doesn’t build up really well. Even the first short bit of erotica when Alexis plays with herself isn’t so much hot as it is a page taken from a porn movie as well. The story isn’t present, there’s no character development to speak of.
I would have liked this a lot more if there was more story. It would have been good to put in a scene of Jacob being changed. Perhaps have things from his perspective as Alexis goes to meet with him. The ending came in a rush, an afterthought. There is a story here somewhere, it could be an interesting one if, for example, Jacob had started this entire thing, calling Marbas to him and then pushing Alexis into the deal with him. But that wasn’t explored.
Erotica isn’t very good without story. This work needs more story, something more to involve the characters in telling the story rather than seeing how strong the table is that they are playing on.
One out of five pitchforks.
This isn’t so much erotica as it is a porn movie scene and one in which the heat isn’t there. If the character Marbas was removed from the work it really wouldn’t have made much of a difference overall. The characters are cardboard, really there only to get into each other’s pants and then come, in more ways than one, to the climax.
That’s disappointing and rather boring.