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Absolution

The concept of giving absolution is, at times, a complicated thing. There are many levels to consider, many possible means to achieve it. But the thing about this particular point is that one cannot simply just ask for …

 

Absolution
By TeraS

 

In every life there comes a time when one must reflect on one’s past. In doing so, one finds there are things done which one isn’t proud of. Those aren’t, always, a problem. One can justify such actions to oneself, to cloak the truth away such that others will never really see it.

However, sometimes there are things that cannot be justified. A moment, something said, an action preformed, something which nags within one’s thoughts, even if they are not completely aware of it always being so. Sometimes, one must face this, to come to terms with it, to try to ask for absolution for what has been. Sometimes there is but one person that can answer the question and give an answer, if one happens to be listening for it—or, for that matter, willing to accept it.

On this day in the Realm the sky was as blue as it always was, the Lake of Fire was calm, reflecting the land that bordered upon it. The clouds surrounded the mountains as they always did and, overall, the Realm was managing as it was meant to, save for one soul who was, at that moment, making her way through the Realm, a specific destination in mind.

Tera, the Queen of the Realm, needed to ask someone a question. The problem was that she wasn’t expecting any sort of answer. Whenever she had spoken to this person in the past, she’d never heard an actual answer. There was no voice to say what the person thought. There was no expression of whether or not her words were even heard.

She had spoken to this person in many different ways, some very personal, some very public. She’d expressed her thoughts about things to others who offered their perspective and made suggestions, and she was given thoughts to consider. She had, of course, examined every one of them, considered each carefully, and did the best she could do. In the end, all of her thoughts and considerations had brought her to this journey where she found herself.

All beings in the universes have, in one way or another, a belief in something. For some, it’s a little bit easier because they know, truly, there is another watching. For some, they have, at least once, been in the presence of Light in the universe.

In the Realm exists a place called the House of Light—a place in which the Goddess of Light is given her proper respect and due. To describe the place is very difficult because it appears differently for each soul. No two see it exactly in the same way. As Tera stood outside of the arched entryway, what she saw was something she never quite could put into words. The best she could do was describe a wonderful, warm place of love and light that shone brightly over the Realm.

Her expression this day was slightly troubled, her thoughts being about what she was going to ask, even while sure that she’d never actually receive an answer. Still, the words needed to be said, she thought, and she began to walk into the House to speak.

Passing into the bright, pure light, she vanished from view; the Realm lost sight of her. For Tera, her first thought was that she must have made a wrong turn, but she was sure she hadn’t passed through Albuquerque. That thought came because she found herself standing beside a certain fence that she knew intimately well.

“You realize, I hope, you have nothing to ask absolution for?”

She smiled, it was her heart and his council was, as always, true.

“Oh … I think I have many things my heart.”

“What you have, Dear One, is your love which drives you.”

“That’s not it.”

“You have your compassion, which you give freely.”

“I know.”

“You have your passion, for every soul you touch.”

“Always.”

“You have your generosity, giving freely without asking for anything in return.”

“Yes.”

“You are, in more ways than I can count, precious to so many.”

“Never really see that, my heart. It’s …”

“… not how you are, Dear One. Yes, I know.”

He was silent for a time, and she was looking around wondering just how it was she came to be at the fence.

“You know … I’m not sure why I’m here, exactly.”

He shook his head slightly: “Oh, I am.”

“How so?”

“Goddess speaks to us in the here and now, but not in ways that you expect … that’s why she brought us together. You, my Dear One, are looking for absolution. But she’s not the one to give that to you.”

“Then who, my heart, should I be talking to?”

Her heart, the one that knew her so very well, just looked at her. When she realized the answer, she pinched her nose and sighed. He just smiled.

“She’s … a bit too stubborn to listen, you know.”

“Yes, she is … at least when it comes to forgiving herself. However, beneath those red horns and behind those so-green eyes, she’s actually a wonderful soul. She might, if given a chance, find a way to give herself absolution.”

Resting her arms on the edge of the fence, that particular red horned woman they were talking about considered. “I think she’s not willing to accept that she’s worthy of absolution.”

“That’s because she, sometimes, can only see her faults and not the light she is.”

“Oh … she sees them both.”

“Seeing them isn’t the same thing as accepting them.”

“Which means?”

“The path to absolution starts inside of each of us, Dear One. Accept that and, perhaps, you’ll find the way.”

“One hopes.”

“One knows.”

The world cascaded into shimmering light and Tera found herself once more in the House of Light. Once more the Realm saw her and she saw the Realm anew.

That evening, as was her custom and joy, she met her heart at the fence.

“Hello, my heart.”

“Hello, Dear One.”

“I had the most unusual day.”

“How so?”

“I had a conversation about absolution.”

“Really? Do tell.”

She leaned over the fence slightly and kissed his cheek: “That story, my heart, begins with a soul of Light that is wiser than he knows and ends with a soul of Light who learned something she didn’t know before.”

He blushed: “You’re welcome, Dear One. But it was not me so much as Goddess working in and through me.”

She smiled: “Whoever it was, thank you, my heart.”

“Anytime and always, Dear One.”

To find absolution within means accepting that need in yourself and seeing the way clear to believing you are worthy of it. But it also, many times, takes the wisdom of another to show you the way. And, Goddess knows even better than Queen Tera that she is never, ever alone.