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Nov 10 2015

Goodbye Britty… We love you…

I’m not going to be telling a story today. Not going to be reviewing something. Last night… We said goodbye to our dog Britty. As I am writing this, it is almost an hour since we left the emergency room. I am looking at her hair on my clothes, her collar on my desk and I am crying. I can see her blanket, here beside me, and it just gets harder by the moment. I want to hear the clicking of her paws on the floor, I want to see her tail wagging. I want to hear her yipping and watch her run around the yard…

And I can’t.

I want to scream in frustration for this. I want to. Goddess… I so want to. All I have right now are the tears. I know there wasn’t a choice. I know that this was “for the best” and… I just keep crying.

We stood outside, in front of our house, and just held each other and cried. Goddess we cried. It’s hard on me, but Goddess it’s so much harder on Keith.

All we have, for now, is her collar and I have been rubbing it between my fingers over and over again. She will be home, we saw to that. She’ll be with Rudy, she’ll be in our family room where she can see her chair, watch us, and know that she’s home.

She’s home.

Goddess please, look after her.

Sunlight streams through window pane
unto a spot on the floor….
then I remember,
it’s where you used to lie,
but now you are no more.

Our feet walk down a hall of carpet,
and muted echoes sound….
then I remember,
It’s where your paws would joyously abound.

A voice is heard along the road,
and up beyond the hill,
then I remember it can’t be yours….
your golden voice is still.

But I’ll take that vacant spot of floor
and empty muted hall
and lay them with the absent voice
and unused dish along the wall

I’ll wrap these treasured memorials in a blanket of my love
and keep them for my best friend until we meet above.

 

Tera

6 comments

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  1. avatar
    James

    Goddess is looking after her, and both of you. Promise

    No other words right now, just huggles from your heart.

  2. avatar
    Legion

    I am deeply sorry Tera. I know how deeply Britty was tied to you and Keith’s heart. And while James is correct about Goddess looking after all of you your family is here for you both as well.

  3. avatar
    pocong

    There’s nothing I can say to make this easier for you but I am here for you and your husband and I’m sorry for your loss. Britty may not be there physically anymore but as long as you remember her and the time you shared together she’ll never really be gone.

  4. avatar
    Elliot

    :: with a worn look of understanding that words would fail to elucidate, gives her a long hug followed by a supportive hand upon one shoulder ::

  5. avatar
    David

    Prayers and love for you and Keith.

  6. avatar
    TeraS

    I know she’s with Goddess, safe and loved… That’s all I need to know…

    Tera

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