A review of the opening work in a new series that has the main character being transformed into being a succubus and what happens from there. It is, really, an interesting idea where this story starts from and who the main character is. However I think the author really needed to think about the title of the work, because honestly it is about the longest title that I have seen in quite some time. Beyond that, the work needs more direction and focus to make what it promises turn out to be more than what it turns out to be.
Revenge is, in many ways, what one makes of it, The thing about that is, sometimes when you have what you want, things turn towards more than revenge. They turn towards changing who you are for all of the wrong reasons.
- Title: Redneck Succubus: Revenge: Served Hot and Sexy with a Side of Deadly
- Author: Beatrice Evenmorne
- Length: 20 Pages
- ASIN: B01226R1MO
- Publishing Date: July 19, 2015
- This work at Amazon.com
The work tells the story of:
Krissy “been done wrong” by Larry, and the last thing you ever want to do is get a country girl mad at you. She already broke off a little piece of revenge when she told everyone about his micro tool, but she wants more, she just doesn’t know how. Fortunately for her, a figurine is about to change her into an irresistibly sexy, deadly, demonic revenge machine. Her first order of the business after obtaining her new busty, curvy body? Find the woman that lured away her man and give her the best, and last, sex she’ll ever have.
Krissy is a little miffed when she finds out that her boyfriend went and slept around with someone else. A chance encounter with a curse changes her and when she discovers what she can do, there are a lot of people that will be paying for what they have done to her.
The work is told from Krissy’s point of view and that, as a whole, makes is very clear that she is, for lack of a better phrase “backwoods trailer trash” in the most stereotypical way. In fact, just about every single possible stereotypical backwoods theme came out in the story, along with all of the accents, mannerisms and more. While this does lend itself to giving Krissy some personality, it also makes the work rather hard to read at times.
Most of the story passes in somewhat of a blur, the point being to get Krissy to the point where she becomes a succubus, in one of the more unique ways that I have read in some time mind you. Once past that, and she is changed, she puts two and two together, comes up with the conclusion she is a succubus now, for some reason, and then goes off to see the woman that was having fun with her boyfriend. Things unfold, there is some futa themes and then the work comes to an abrupt close before Krissy moves on to have more fun with those that have “wronged her.”
The story seems to just be in a hurry from the first to the last, not dwelling much on telling about Krissy and the others except in quick little descriptions. The transformation scene is a bit odd because, the way Krissy tells it, she experiences everything, then can’t remember it, so how is it that she tells about it? This is written in first-person, so how does that work exactly? Also, how is it that she knows she is a succubus? The means of her transformation isn’t exactly clear on that, but, considering how she was before it happened, it does make some sense in a way.
Because of the internal monologue from Krissy, the work is a little hard to read at times because there’s so much put into the accent of her internal voice that things get muddled up, sometimes unclear. The erotic scenes aren’t exactly erotic either in that they just don’t have a lot of heat in them, for one thing. The other is that after Krissy has her power, then she’s completely focused on revenge, so the erotica is glossed over in order to get to the revenge she is looking for.
To be clear, really none of the characters, save for Krissy, are that interesting, being they are rather thinly written and don’t have much to do save for being the focus of Krissy’s ire. However they do serve as a focal point for the rest of the story at least.
Krissy as a succubus is not really seductive, though she does become sexier. She doesn’t have, at least so far, anything obviously succubus-like about her as yet, though I expect in the next work that will happen. There is a question left unanswered, though hinted at in the title and a comment by Krissy which, for me, also turns the story a bit dark in a lot of ways.
That’s a shame because the Krissy of before isn’t quite the Krissy of after. While there’s not a lot to like, at least in the beginning she had some promise and could have been developed into something more than she was. That just didn’t happen and that is the problem here.
One and a half pitchforks out of five.
I’m hoping that the next work in the series, if it appears, takes Krissy from being stereotypical towards something a lot more interesting. There is a real chance to do that, to make something of her rather than “just” what she has become.
It would be better than the start I think.