There are of course many different kinds of Succubi. There are the traditional “take your soul” kind. There are the “too beautiful to be real and they tick off every woman within fifty miles” kind. Sometimes they have some alterations to their form that make them a bit different from what the norm expects them to be. Now, none of that is a bad thing, I must be clear on that…
The question is, what do you make of the idea you have when you write the story? What is it about the Succubus that makes her unique, interesting, and most importantly, what gives her an aspect, beside her form alone, that makes her a Succubus?
- Title: Suburban Succubus
- Author: Jane Mesmeri
- Publishing Date: December 3, 2012
- Length: 13,000 Words
- ASIN: B00AIVNPEY
- This work at Amazon.com
The story tells of:
Janine Broder lives happily in the suburbs with her second husband, Michael. With his daughter, Megan, almost ready to leave for college, they look forward to having more time for each other.
When Katrina Hunter moves into the neighborhood, Janine welcomes her, but is shocked when she catches her neighbor servicing the movers.
At night, sensual dreams tease Janine, and she finds herself doing things with Michael she’d never done before. But as the dreams grow stronger, Mrs. Broder begins to suspect they aren’t simply dreams. And that her neighbor is somehow responsible for them.
It’s nice to have a story about Succubi not be about them being evil or destructive. It seems that many writers take the easy way out with a Succubus in their works. This author didn’t. I liked the explanation of what Succubi are in this universe. It was different, they are different, and those differences while a bit odd to a point, do not take away from who the Succubi are in this story.
The physical difference with these Succubi mainly is their tails. Now personally it bothered me slightly at first, but then I remembered that in some Japanese manga, the Succubi have similar tails and I managed to get past that. It is a minor difference and really the more interesting part of things to me was when a new Succubus is created. The transformation is.. well. it’s not what you would expect really. That’s not a bad thing, it did make me pause and consider how such a thing would work, but in the end it was just a step in the story. The real transformation is in the characters that surround Katrina.
The author managed to make those changes not seem to be too impossible for lack of a better word. There is some subtle mind control throughout the story and it wasn’t beaten into you when it happened. It was obvious that something was going on, and you had a good idea of what it was. It wasn’t spelled out to you, you had to imagine what was going on and why and I enjoyed that. When the control does come into play, it isn’t simply brushed aside when the threads of the story are tied up. The how and why and what it means for the Succubi in this story fit together. Again, this makes the story a better read.
I found myself as the end of the story wondering where it would go from there. The way that the characters are changed, who becomes a Succubus, who becomes their pet, or pets for that matter, is left open a bit. I would hope that the next part, if there is one, brings the other side of the story of the control in it. We have a good idea how the victims felt, what is it like for the Succubus? There are hints, but I’d like to see more than that.
The characters are well fleshed out, the writing is excellent with the erotica part of the story, but not the story alone. There is more to this work than just the sex and that made me more interested in it. Succubi are, after all, more than sex… Not everyone gets that.
Getting to the sex in the work, while some of it was a bit more than I personally like, in the context of the story it made sense and as well the Succubus herself, in how she acted and what those effects have on Janine. It was a well done personality change through the course of the story and in the end the final act explains the how and why of that really well.
It didn’t leave me wanting in that way, but I do admit that I would have liked to have seen more from Katrina’s point of view in the story. We get some of that in a round about way yes, but knowing what she is, almost from the beginning… It left me wanting a bit.
I’ll give this work four pitchforks out of five.
The story is complete… To a point. The door is open to the next part of the story, and i’d like to see what is behind that door. It should be, so very much so, interesting…